Sunday, April 30, 2006

Fun with Dick and Jane

See Dick. See Jane. See Dick and Jane have fun. (ok this is beginning to sound pervertic...)

Movie unknown to me until recently, this movie pictures how doing good will not always be rewarded with good. Everything was perfect with Dick (Jim Carrey) and Jane (Tea Leoni), and they never did anything bad. But when there is evil in the world, not all good will get good in this lifetime. (you may debate afterlife, but that's not the point here...)

Modern society values materialism and things of the now, more than the later. How happy will you be if nothing is going your way and there is no silver lining? Even if you are, how long can you last? In case of Dick and Jane, the ended up resorting to robbery and what not. Of course, this is only out of desperation, and they never hurt anyone. Ponder that. What will you do if you are bankrupt and have no where to live? No food, water, electricity... To what extent will you go?

Anyways the story ends quite... er... I can't describe it, but I didn't really agree with it. But it showed, the good will get good. That's a moral for ya.

Face it, everyone of us will value materialism some time, in one way or the other. And to show that I am guilty of it, I would say that I would like the follwing items:
1. PDA - need it for easy reference
2. Camera in my phone or PDA - thinking of taking pictures of visual signs
3. Clinical Examination by Talley & O'conner - for reference
4. Heater - else I will freeze in winter here...
5. Novels - desperately bored. Else, a PDA can store eBooks...
6. Winter clothing - same as heater
7. Mode of private transport - Bicycle will do, but a car will be better...

These are things that I am currently living without and still surviving. So the question would be whether I really need them or not.

My senior was kind enough to take us (transport) to a shopping complex to look for some of these things. Couldn't find a cheap heater or winter clothes and instead I bought 2 shirts that I probably don't need. Ah well... this is what you get from a Manic Episode.

And of course since my senior had to follow me around, I had to follow my senior too. So we went to this women clothing shop called Witchery. It's just weird to go in there. There wasn't anything wrong with the place... but it just feels weird to be going into a shop for women... and neither of us were one. brr...

Adventures... sigh...

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Too Much Free Time, yet so much to do...

"All ignorant people generalize"

I like to generalize things. So in the end, I will contradict myself. I tried to explain my feelings and thoughts but they always end up being total opposites. Since I can't remember when, I have been inflicted with a chronic sense of boredom. There are so many things that I can do, like studying, or reading. But instead, I find myself just lazing around playing or watching anime. Then, I get bored of doing those things as well... now I am not doing anything productive at all.

I've just only started writing notes on my previous rotation. Something that I should have done during the last rotation. My problem seems to be the filing system. I want something organised, but what actually comes organised by itself? apart from the text book... I should be doing notes on MEDICAL stuff, not psychiatry... psychiatry should be my the least of my worries.

General Med has been... too relaxed. I am getting worried about how slack I am. After what happpened in Psych, I really should have learnt my lesson, yet I am still stuck this way. So far, I have approached 5 patients; 1 moreless completed history (but got transfered down to cardiology), 1 informal chat session (missed out so much medical information), 1 just the presenting complaint (not even history of presenting complaint), and 2 turned me down because they were in pain. I wish they weren't sick.

So, I am left with 1 case to present tomorrow.

I conclude that I am living in a undecisive, contradicting world...

However, there are somethings that are certain. And when I am sure of it, I will assert it. Again, i assert that I am living in a undecisive, contradicting world...

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Black and White
(Post for Easter)

How often can you, at the end of the day, lie in bed and think about the day, and not wish that something was different? Last Friday was a day that I can think back and truly say that I don’t want anything changed. No “what if” questions, no worries about tomorrow, and no “I should have done this, done that.” It really was a Good Friday for me…

The church service in the morning was interesting. The pastor questioned, Though we live luxuriously (compared to the past), why are we still not happy? What will make everyone happier?

It isn’t hard for us to split everyone into 2 groups; one good, one bad. We just need to get rid of the ‘bad’ and everyone would be living peacefully. It’s just so easy to do that and it’s not impossible… Relationship to Black and White? It’s all about good and bad.

In the game, there are almost always 2 ways to solve a problem or mission; a good way, and an evil way. As time progresses, you and your creature would either start glowing in an angelic halo, or bear scars and claws of anger and hatred. The good way, naturally takes more time and nobody gets hurt, and the evil, speeds up the game tremendously.
In all, it shows our nature about things, we all have the potential to do good and bad. And it’s not about splitting the world into 2, but more like our own hearts that is split up. And it is up to us to show which side of it.

Later that night, there was another church event, with dinner and performances. There is something about being in this group of people gives me courage and make me build my own confidence… There were many talented performers that night, and I was wishing that I could be as talented as them; Rachel, Lydia, Katie, Steve... even the little Abby, who was helping out diligently. ^_^

There was also a talk, on the topic of Jesus and the Simpsons. The speaker showed many remarks by the characters about God and religion and how God in the Simpsons have 5 fingers when the other characters all had 4. It’s how like I see stuff in House and make me wonder about things. The Simpsons do have some ideas on how life is in reality, and there are really moral values that can be learnt from that series.

But then again, which show doesn't have moral values?

Thursday, April 13, 2006

My Manic Episode

Mania is characterised by:
A. having a period of abnormally and persistently elevated mood.
B. (1) inflated self-esteem, (2) decrease need for sleep, (3) more talkative, (4) flight of ideas, (5)easily distracted, (6) increase in goal directed activity, (7) excessive involment in pleasurable activities.
C. impaired social functioning

This episode can be a defence mechanism which hides the fact that I am internally distraught and chaotic. I have been more talkative than necessary, having trains of ideas, I'm not paying attention in lectures, and I almost got involved in a shopping spree.

And this is what I had been up to the past hour or so:

Meet Linda.

(picture has been removed)

And of course, me.

This is what she did to me.

And this is what she did to me further.

It was fun to get a free hair cut. Heh... (hum Queer Eye for the Straight Guy)

This is a break from my very agitated self. I didn't do well for my Psychiatry Exam and I am set to have practice interviewing sessions later in the year. So I can brush up my skills. It may be a bore and chore, but I think this is a very good opportunity for me to really be serious about things and do well. I don't have a problem being empathetic (I think...) but I think I sacrificed too much of the goal directed questions.

I also plan to get a job soon, and buy a bicycle. At least I will have a source of income and a mode of transport. And it would be a good experience and a method of exercise.

Oh well. We'll see how things go.


Monday, April 10, 2006

This is a very depressing posting for me. This posting will make you start to think about the different people around you and understand why they act the way the act... and then you start diagnosing them with psychiatric illnesses. They are amongst us.

Heck, there are even movies about these people, and even real life celebrities who have psychiatric illnesses. Some professions just needs a person to be so, accountants should have a compulsive disorder, lighthouse watch should be a schizoid, actors be hysterionic... They are more prevalant than you think!

Anyway, back to my posting... Psychiatry is a very long process, from long history takings, long management, and long list of problems and treatment.

Long History. Tomorrow, I will be sitting for an exam, that will test my presentation skills and diagnosing and management. Today, I sat for one that tested my interviewing skills. I failed miserably. I declare the session unjust, but I know where I went wrong. I was probably to familiar with the patient and knew her diagnosis before I sat down to interview her. That led me to only have a checklist and not ask in detail about her change. That cost me dearly. Depressing.

Long List of Problems. The list is almost endless. Mood disorders - Depression, mania, depression with psychotic symptoms, mania with psychotic symptoms, hypomanic, hypothymic, cyclothymic, bipolar I, bipolar II, etc... Anxiety disorders - OCD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, social phobia, specific phobia, agoraphobia, panic attack, etc... Schizophrenia. Schizophreniaform. Schizoaffective. brief Schizo... Drug induced... Sleep disorders... Sexual disorders (which reminds me of what we did in Moral Studies; necrophilia, zoophilia, paedophilia, homophilia, etc...) ... erm... that's all I can remember apart from the Dementia/Delirium and other medical causes for psychiatric problems.

Long List of Treatment. Each grouping has it's specific drug, but since each disorder can overlap into the other, the drugs will also overlap. It's just too long a list to do here. And that's just the drugs. There is also the other Therapies, like CBT, ECT, hypnotism, acupucture, etc...

Long List of Management. I am getting tired of listing down stuff. It's a long list. There are many ways to manage psychiatric patients.

The only difference in the outcome is whether the patient complies or not. Some do. Some don't know they need to. Some don't get better anyway. So it's sad.

It's hard not to get depressed in here.

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