Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Letter to My Friend IV

Dear J,

Yup, if you noticed my slower and slower reply, it usually means that I have a little too much on my mind right now. I have just handed in all my reports and assessments done last night. Although we have done all the work, we're still expected to turn up for tutorials in hospital. I am a but annoyed, but on the other hand glad that I am getting some good teaching.

I am going to watch Stomp 09 tomorrow night. THAT I have been looking forward to for about a month now. And since all my work is done, I will not have much worried left and I can fully enjoy the show. I've talked so much about why I love Stomp, I won't waste time typing it out... BUT I LOVE STOMP. heh. I do wonder do you get to see any theatrical stuff over there. I'm pretty sure you can watch all those orchestral stuff there. Which reminds me of the Lord of the Rings Symphony that was going around back when it was a hit. Did you manage to catch that?

A few other things that are on my mind... It's been over a week now since I've heard from her. An optimistic notion would be that she has not been online for that amount of time. I know it has been getting a bit busy nowadays... The pessimist in me also says that she's avoiding you because she's not looking for a relationship... with you... But realistically, I am just going to wait and see. It is a mind numbing wait.

Now with my internet cap resetted, I managed to obtain some old movies for my entertainment, and that has been occupying my time when I am stressed. I also managed to catch the season finale of Heroes. It really has become twisted, and there are things that I wish were back to normal. Peter's original ability was the best, same like Sylar's. In Villains, the storyline became really perversed. I liked Villains on the other hand because they made everyone's powers both good and evil, and it really depended on who had it. That was the core message that Heroes had. I also liked the fact that there are always ways to kill even the strongest of the Heroes. Now, for Redemption, I am not looking forward to it as much anymore, as my favourite powers are gone. But it just made me think more.

My phone was giving me problems this past week. At first, I thought it would be cool not to be reachable, but it wasn't. I had to make so many phone calls to the phone company to get it settled. Hopefully everything is solved now. The only thing left is the $30 credit that disappeared during this transaction. It is just so annoying.

Right, sorry this letter is mostly about my worries and thoughts. I will get to replying your last letter in my next. Until then...

Ken Rhee

Monday, April 27, 2009

What is your deepest fear?

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

~ Marianne Williamson

Letter to my Friend III

Dear J,

I have to confess that I have a lot of things going on with me now. It made me think back about my life and reminisce about my past and how I got here. It made me think about you. I haven't seen you or talked to you in person for a long time, and i do relly miss the friendsip that we had. It's really good to hear from you

Ok, enough of the sad talk.

I tried watching Dollhouse, but I dunno why I cannot follow it. I gave up on Greys Anatomy too. I haven't watch Southland though. I watch The Listener too. I cant help but think about how Heroes first started and how they got used to their powers. This time it is focused on one person revealing his past and his adventures now. I suspect a hidden conspiracy going on as Heroes did at the beginning. Perhaps as the series progresses they will add that in, but I really hope it doesn't. But I have to agree that the addition of the telepathic healing girl in the latest episode was disappointing. Somehow I felt like it could take the mutant path too...

I'm also watching Lie To Me. I don't understand why you don't like it. Although I try to look for these micro-expressions, I still don't see people any different. And I certainly do not try not to do all these tell tale signs. I'm pretty much the same person. I've done a bit more reading about microexpressions and all that. apparently only something like 50 people have been identified to have the ability. It's a rare thing so don't be afraid people start reading you. You should really try continue watching it.

Speaking of reading, have you read any books lately? I haven't have time to read anything. I need fresh material. The last book you recommended... All Creatures Great and Small... to feed my interest in animals. I vaguely remember how close I came to wanting to be a Vetenarian... But I guess it also made me think more about saving lives, hence me doing medicine. By the way, I found that there's a series out though, like 30 years ago, based on the books.

By all means please send over your completed works. I look forward to listening to them. If it was just as good as before, I'm pretty sure I will like it. And I really look forward your songs when you DO have a muse. I know having a subject of interest definitely have some impact on my creativity level. It is not just about impressing someone, I am proud of my creations.

Anyway, I will let you know if there is anymore progress on my side. As of now, it doesn't look good. At this point, I just want to tell someone all about my day, all the good things... and hear their day in return. But I will let you know if there is something to tell.

I am looking forward to hear about your next world adventure.

Ken Rhee

Friday, April 24, 2009

Letter to my Friend II

Dear J,

That was a fast reply. Glad to hear you alive and well in UK. I have always wanted to travel there. It is so rich in it's history, but I guess it is because we studied so much of Asean history, I am actually bored of it. I would love to see the medieval castles and stonehenge and all that historical stuff. I'll definitely make plans to meet up with you there someday. You can poke my belly then.

Yes, I still love my play of language. I'm still that punny guy you know so long ago. I still like writing, creating poetry and thinking of some long winded flowery description of simple things. I annoy my juniors sometimes with it. Haha. I haven't been doing it much though. The last poem I wrote was last year and it was a crappy one not about my feelings and all. But, the next one I create, you'll be the first to read it. Or rather, I'll put it here as usual and you can read it then. The ongoing one is about the girl I like and the way she makes me feel. Cheesy and cliche, I know. That is why it is taking so long. I want it to be different and still romantic. How's your music composing going?

How did I ever forget the debates we had about evolution and creationism. Endless nights of pleasure of speaking your mind. I miss those times, all those topics that we talked about. I have to say that evolution was the most interesting dscussion yet. We will definitely have to continue that debate again and other topics yet to come. And possibly more things to say, now that we've grown a little. I'll look forward to your opening statement. ^_^

Yeah, well, the reason why I like this girl so much is still a mystery to me. I guess I started noticing her after I had my dream. I mean I dream a lot, and dream of other people, but seldom have any impact like this. And when it does, it will stick to me until something happens. She's sweet, nice, independant, friendly... and thats the extent of how I can describe her. I have to admit that I do not know her at all, yet I am so attracted to her. Yes, she is pretty. I would tell you more, if there is anything to tell. And no I am not telling you her name so that you cannot stalk her out. I know your skills are better than mine. Anyway, what about yourself? Is there someone existing that breaks your vow of celibacy?

You don't have to tell me. Everyone is telling me to go for it, give it a try, you'll never know. I'm hoping that you would say something different, like you always do. I still take your words in high regard, so you better live up to it. haha.

Apart from that, well, I have been watching a lot of TV shows lately. And movies. But I think I'll let you go first. Else, this letter will go on forever... Till then, good luck with your job interview.

Ken Rhee

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Letter to my Friend.

Dear J

Hi, how have you been? I am sorry that I have not been writing to you in a long while. I kinda lost your contacts so I am writing to you in the most bizziare way I can think of. (No one visits here anyway...)

Anyway, I have been alright. If you read down, you'll see that I had been at camp last weekend. It was good. After my friend left, my other friends came on the next boat. Somehow to me, they are the sunrays that were seeping through that cloudy morning. I am really grateful as they were the few who helped me pass my exams last year. Unlike you, who conveniently disappeared to some European state. Sheesh.

Haha. Anyway, that day turned out pretty good considering that it was such a gloomy morning. I keep using that word... I cannot think of a better one. Dark. Dementoric. Apocalyptic. Anyway, I took part in the tug-of-war later that day, which to this day made me ache all over. It is probably my punishment for not keeping fit as I should have. Remember that annoying belly that you always talked about and like to make fun of? Well, I have it now...

That night we played cards, and then head to the pub. The music was nice. Very dancable, very relaxing. Oh, and it was on an astroturf. I took off my sandals and danced barefooted. It is a feeling that I have not felt in a very long time and it made me remenisce about my days back in Singapore... I remembered bringing you there, so you should know what I mean.

It was pretty much the same from then on. Got home all tired and broken...

And this week is assignment week. All of it is due this Friday. Even so, I don't know why I found the time to have dinner and coffee with a few friends last night. We talked about life in general, starting from the Big Bang... Evolution vs creationism... our younger days and upbringing... growing up with taxes and morgages... to eventually death. At the end of it, I do not know why, but I felt that I wouldn't mind dying tomorrow. I mean, not only do I escape the fear of handing up assignments on Friday, but not to suffer all the pains and despair of the world. I doubt that anyone would mourn for me, nor do I want them to.

Which also brings me to what a friend told me. Live life with no regrets. I would certainly regret not saying how I feel to this particular girl. I do, feel like I want to spend every giving minute with her as though I were to die the next. I wish I can muster that courage to do that. I wish I had more fear of not knowing, than the fear of being rejected. I wish, I wish...

Anyway, enough from me. I do wish you read this and reply me soon. Do take care.

Ken Rhee

Monday, April 20, 2009

Post Camp

I have a feeling that Blizzard has my timetable with them, coz they release major patches when I am not free. They released WotLK a week before my finals last year... and this time, they released 3.1 the week with my camp on the weekend.

Brief outline of patch 3.1:
Ul-doo-ar raid finally opens with new bosses and hard modes. Mobs actually are HARD to go through. Bosses are harder and much more fun.
New gear, especially T8 and legendary healing mace.
Argent tornament, new means to get pets and mounts. I still do not understand the story behind it as I was too busy to explore it.
Spell/talent revamp. Mana regen nerf. I hate it, but I hope my build is still viable as before.

So there's all these new changes but I have not fully emmersed myself in all of it. Heck, due to some changes in schedule, I don't actually have time to do more than just the raid this week. Somehow I get a feeling that these are all signs that God doesn't want me playing anymore >.< Right... and the reason why I was away during the weekend: 6th Year CAMP! Originally from another batch, I started out only know a handful of people there. I got there way earlier than the rest and I was so lost in that first hour. I didn't see anyone I knew and I don't know who the rest were, so I could not find where we were supposed to meet. Only when I saw familiar faces at the registration booth that I calmed down and started enjoying myself with the food and drinks. I probably drank too much wine too fast, and I ended up with a headache for the rest of the afternoon. A slight mishap, but I immediately I made new friends. As the sun was setting, we finally made our way to the boat to get to the island. This boat was different from the one I was on last year, and there were no seats out in the open. So I couldn't get a good shot of the sunset, but this was the only thing I could muster.

The stars were emerging as we started our walk from the jetty to the dorms. I got my wish, somewhat... to walk under the stars with her. We finally made our way to the dorms. The first thing I noticed were the herd of Quokkas in the courtyard. Last year, I really wanted to get good shots of quokkas, but this overabundance was just scary. Anyway, we all found beds to sleep in (I got a single room which was good) and we got ready for the night's party. Dress code: Mad Hatters.

There was supposed to be a prize for the best hat, so I put a little bit more effort into making mine. Sadly it didn't win me the prize, but I had fun. There were really good hats, and there were party hats on the table for those who were lazy to bring their own. After dinner, we all hung around gossiping, chatting, getting quokka's drunk, etc... What I really wanted at that point in time was to leave the rowdy drunk crowd and head to the beach and walk in the cold sand with the stars in the sky. It was sad to go alone, so I didn't. Sigh.

We ended up playing asshole 'big two' which I do not like at all. The fundamental flaw in the game is the winner usually stays the winner and it is hard for the loser to move up. Although I was very much against the game, I joined in anyway. I remained in the lower half of the rankings and hated it. Luckily, they did not include shots of vodka as a punishment just yet. However, when we DID include it, some of us were too tired to continue. heh.

The night was horrible. My room was at the entrance, so there were too many people walking in and out shouting and laughing every now and then. It took me a while to get sleep in the end, but I managed to in the end. UNFORTUNATELY, I was plagued by unpleasant dreams.

The next morning, I got up to a gloomy morning. The weather forcast was said to be thunderstorm in the late morning, and I can sense the incoming storm. In all directions, you can see the rain falling in the distance. There was only small patches of sky, and occasionally we'll see a ray of golden sun seeping through, reminding me that there is always light in time of despair... cheezey, but there it was. We walked her to the jetty that gloomy morning, as she was leaving on the early boat. We said our goodbyes and I was really sad to see her go...

Monday, April 13, 2009

Easter 09

Some people go to church and become Christians only on Sundays. Me, I go once a year. It's Easter once again, and I make my annual trip to church in Curtin.

The Easter service held by the Zion Praise Harvest was better this year. They called in a guest speaker who was also an ex convict, 3 time world kungfu title holder, ex hired thug, ex body guard, who basically told his life story and how he became a christian. To me, it is not one of those typical 'everything was going bad, but Jesus showed me the way' story. Although it did boil down to that, but I find his story interesting. Due to copy right issues I don't think I should provoke an ex-murderer and tell this story here...

He ended his talk with a nice presentation, about heaven and hell, and how we all have impure souls coz we all are lying thiefs who thinks of murder. So we are all going to hell.

Then he says how we can save ourselves. Instead of the 'become a christian, baptise, etc' talk, he gave it in two steps. Turn away from all the things that are wrong. And to surrender yourself to Jesus.

I have told many people that the only thing that is stopping me from becoming a Christian is today, the part of where Jesus is ressurected. The believing in Jesus. The surrendering of my soul to this... being...

I do not know what surrendering to Jesus entails that is different from what I have already been thinking and doing. And how different will I be if I do that. It's just mind boggling...

Also today, I met a new friend, an intern graduated from Adelaide. She really made my day today, and I do want to thank her for that. And it being Easter at Curtin Uni, I get to listen once again to the girl with the beautiful voice. And again, I did not have the courage to go up to her to say, "You have such a beautiful voice, and after one year, I am still in love with your voice." I really wish that I can get to know you and listen to it again...

On a side note, I went to see Dragonball: Evolution later that night. Graphics were good, but the acting was mediocre and the story was lacking. Only Goku had his character development laid out, and the others were poorly done. Master Roshi's pervertness was only shown at the beginning and no where else. Yamcha was super calefare, with a sudden love sparks with Bulma, of all people. Chi Chi's plot was disjointed and when Mai assumes her identity for a scene, continuity confusion!!!

Revelations at the end was so random, yet predictable. Suddenly confusing advice from the start of the show miraculously fall into place and suppose to make sense.

Reviews were right. 3/10.

Happy Easter everyone...

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