Monday, August 29, 2005


I've been busy. Really busy. Last week was the killer, but I survived through it. It could turn out differently, but it happened the way it happened. I guess that's fate for you.

I've submitted my narrative to apply for PMS. I read a few others and some were better, some need more. but almost all of them unique and special. It is about who the writer is anyway. Most of us probably have some reason, but I still haven't found mine yet. Truly.

What I wrote in my narrative is just the superficial part. But one part remains true, my feelings about children. Ever since that day, I can't pass by children clinging onto their mothers without thinking, "Let me impart my knowledge to the child, may he get something like what I had and having." I guess one can see it as an act of cockyness to think that I am so smart to 'impart' knowledge to. I'm not. I can't explain it, but I do it. I wish the best to them, get a good education, be thoughtful and rational, many freinds. I really do wish to see them successful. I don't know why.

Probably half of them will turn out bad, if not all of them. By bad, I mean bad. I mean drug addicts, rapists, con-men, corrupt politicians, money-minded businessmen... There is no place for sainthood in this world. It's a little sad. I really want to change and I hope I am doing it right.

I've watched House, Scrubs, and they showed one thing, that medicine is run like a business. Insurance is an important factor to see who gets the treatment first. Who has the money would get the treatment first, who has a big name gets the treatment first. Of course there are doctors like Dr. House and Dr. Cox, who defy the admin to get their patients the treatment they deserve. Who is wrong then? The admin, or the doctors who break the rules to treat the patient. Is this what separates the good doctors and the bad ones?

But still, the world has more corrupted, money minded people and how many actually genuinely want to help people anymore? After reading some narratives, I am a little happier, and I hope that those people follow what they write. It's a start.

Saturday, August 13, 2005


What caught me was the part about AI. AI that went beserk and waged war against humanity and the bad stuff. We've seen it in The Matrix, we've seen it in I, Robot, we've even seen it in The Terminator. So what sets this movie apart?

The movie covered everything. Reasons for and reasons against. EDI was made for a purpose, to fight for humans. Basically fight a battle for us against the enemy. No more recieving news that your sons and daughters have died in service to the country. And furturmore, high percision, high accuracy, and no mistakes. Computer can do all that.

Though, there is a quote that states that to be human is to make mistakes. Can a computer make mistakes? It does what it is told. It follows a set of rules that it must strictly abide to. Reminds me of a couple of fellow medic student who does things by the book. No room for improvision, go haywire with the slightest contradiction, and panic when things are not like the book. That is life. Humans are about adapting, computers at its current state cannot adapt. The beauty about humansis that we do not have a limit like computers do. Sure, we have certain limitations, but our brain can go beyond physical limitations, and I think that is what sets us apart.

The idea behind Artificial Intelligence is that it has the capability to learn. It has a higher capability to learn than most humans. It can learn everything, from baking a cake, to designing a building. It can also learn how to poison someone and to destroy a building. It all depends on who teaches it. This is another similarity with humans. Many people in the world are brainwashed with the wrong teaching. Who in the right mind would blow himself up in the middle of the street? or wage war against another group of people? And the factor that sets us apart is morality. A computer would not know whether what it is learning right or wrong... and even we find it hard to differentiate what is right and wrong. This is something that we can never fully understand too. In medic, we would be facing dilemmas and we have to decide on what is right and what is right. Right for the patient, right for the politics that goes around. We learn that this action is right in this situation, but there is also the patient's possible reactions or politics which makes the action wrong. There isn't a guideline for everything, and definitely not for instincts and hunches, and that is why AI cannot be programmed to handle everything.

And the real purpose in this blog: Will computers ever replace doctors? It replaced many jobs already. This movie talks about AI replacing pilots. And with every AI movie, humans prevail. Why? Because we can take chances, take risk againsts the odds, we can accept, we can dream. So my answer to my question is, no.

Though, maybe one day... And there is no use for humans... I picture a tiny blob on a pedestal, surrounded by machines for everything. Actually I can't picture anymore. There would be no purpose of life... well, that's another story...

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Neck Ache

This is what you get for sleeping on several layers of mattresses and soft pillows. It only takes a few minutes on these and viola! Instant neckache. It can last you for a day, or even longer. Apply deep heating medication to relief the pain. Massaging also gives temporary relief.


This is what you get for staying out in the open for too long, given the current API. (I think this pun was made fully intended) Why smoke when you can die of lung cancer this way too? or else, MIGHT AS WELL SMOKE. A smoker's commen: "I'm already smoking, this stupid haze is making it worse..." Prevention of complications include:
1. Staying indoors, making sure you get clean air though
2. Reduce pollution, by car pooling, no barbeques, reduce joss sticks, etc.
3. Drink a lot of water to cleanse your system. Prevent dehydration.
4. Buy a mask. You may think it's stupid, but it's healthy. There's no shame in that.


This is what you get if you have no hope or will to do anything else. Everything is turning out to be disappointing and you are not getting what you hope you will get. When you find out that the world is not as ideal as you thought it was, and there is nothing you can do about it, it's easy to go into depression and give up. One cure is to wake up from your dream and to face reality. Being a Doctor is harder than you think, and more disappointing. And this applies to all types of jobs.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

It's been slightly more than a week in the new Semester...

Things I have been doing:
1. New graphics card. ATI Radeon 9600Pro.

this leads to...

2. More computer games run smoother.

which leads to...

3. New study schedule to compensate the slacking days in the past. Now I have study in it balanced with computer.

which leads to...

4. Hoping for a better grade, etc. I have managed to skim through Sem 4 pretty well, so I just need touching up. Need a good report for...

5. PMS Matching system: You can only go anywhere you want if you have a good enough report card.

Aih, new challenges await...

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