Letter to my Friend VI

Dear J
Sorry for the late reply. I just started a new term and we're just getting down to doing the intern work. I am glad to be in my team, because I get to see all the fresh patients from the Emergency Department, with all their untreated medical illnesses. They really have great signs, like pulmonary edema, heart murmurs, etc. Well, some better than others. I had a demented old lady who came in, was quite aware of where she was, but while I was talking to her, she started becoming drowsy and well... long story short, the next day, she didn't remember me, couldn't tell me correctly where she was, or why she is in hospital. And I have to write a report on her to be marked.

Apart from that, I went on a movie spree. Well, not much of a back to back or day after day, but I watched half a dozen movies since I wrote to you last. Lets see if I can list them down:

X-Men Origins: Wolverine - awesome movie, but elements of which did not follow the original comics, but was still a good watch.
Star Trek - The awesome beginning to a whole fandom that is Star Trek. I enjoy the pewpew war in Star Wars, but Star Trek is about how space adventure is meant to be. I converted to a trekkie fan after the movie too.
Angels & Demons - the title has not much reference to angels or demons, though it can be potrayed by the struggle between science and religion, the revalation of the antagonist's good and bad side, or just by the sheer number of angel statues in the movie. The puzzles stuck with the book, mostly, and left out the contraversial ending of the novel. But it was still a good watch.
The Notebook - it was different from what I thought it would be. Touching and sad... but a fairytale.
The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants II - it was like watching a familiar story, of childhood dreams and promises falling apart, growing older and travelling down your own path in life. Friends will be friends, but we will have to leave the nest one day.

Thats all I can think of, movies that struck and stuck.

Apart from that, I was meant to tell you my adventures in gambling. I guess everyone will be enticed by it at some point in life. It is such an easy way to win. The thrill of winning releases hormones that make you high, so you want more. That's if you win. If you lose, you fill with regret and makes you strive to 'win back' that money. The only thing that can save you is to know when to quit. Preferably before you actually put money down, but anytime down the road is always good.

Not only in Burswood Casino, my friend also started me on buying Lotto every week. The jackpot has rose to 20million and we still dream of having that much money. Sadly, even being educated, math-inclined individuals, we still want to try our luck with it. It's only $3.70 a week, but having $15 a month is equal to me playing WoW. Just that I have no chance of earning anything from WoW.

There is also a syndrome or condition or something about gambling. It applies to relationships and it was what I experienced in my past. My ex would throw tantrums about things that she is not happy about, expecting me to make things better. Sometimes, yes I feel guilty and do something about it, but other times, it became annoying or helpless that I didn't or couldn't do anything. It's like gambling. Sometimes she wins and gets what she wants, but she also loses. Eventhough losing hurts, but she would still went on with her behaviour hoping that things get done. And she kept doing it. and doing it. and doing it. and eventually I lost it. That's gambling for you.

And so what is this 'inspiration' doing to you? What does it add to your life? You have to tell me more than that...

Until next time.

Ken Rhee

Letter to a Friend V

Dear J
Sorry for the late reply. It was the end of the term and I had case reports and things to hand in and get signed. But it is finally over. Surgery is over. It really got me thinking about why I wanted to do surgery before. I like the getting down and DOING something and seeing the result... But I find myself unable to get around the barrier which is Internship. Basically we were expected to follow the intern around and doing what they do. Sadly, there is nothing much we can do and I did not get much out of it at all. Over all, I thought my surgery term was crap. Fortunately I had a very good consultant who was eager to teach and get us thinking about the basics for medicine. I really appreciate the teaching...

Anyway, how are things going now? I heard your music and it is GOOD. It is the sort of music that I play when I am trying to study. Not so loud, yet inspirational, and not sleepy. I don't see (or rather hear) anything that you can improve on. I like it as it is, but if you are going to 'improve' it, send the new copy over. So are you going to send it to a recording company or something? And you have to tell me your source of inspiration. It did sound like you were writing it about someone you fancy. SPILL!!!

My story still did not change much from the last. I am still waiting for a sign, but it doesn't really look like there's anything. I could have been imagining all of it. It is depressing, but strive on, I guess...

Yesterday was interesting. It started with me waking up late, reaching late. Fortunately, so were the doctors. Unfortunately, they had to start seeing patients immediately. Fortunately we didn't have to sit in boring clinics. Unfortunately we didn't do anything either. Fortunately, I took a day off and went home. Unfortunately I played the whole day. Fortunately I finally got an item from Ulduar. unfortunately I think I overbidded on it and found out that my old one was just as good if not better...

And I went to Burswood Casino after raid. Unfortunately I lost $30. Fortunately the 1:1 exploitation worked. Unfortunately we lost everything. I'll tell you more about my adventrues and thoughts in the next.

Ken Rhee