Tuesday, November 20, 2007

I just can't wait until my exams are over. This is the list of movies that I want to watch:
The Mist Stephen King thriller with plot from Half-life. Should be interesting, no?
Beowolf Mythology... another movie with dragons and monsters. Yum...
Golden Compass Quests, adventures and animal spirits... I wonder what animal would I have?
Enchanted I am just curious. Really intrigued by Disney and their ideas
Grace is Gone Another movie to satisfy my achieving Fatherhood curiosity
Juno Well... motherhood is also important right?
When did you last see your father It just sounds touching... I miss home already.
The Bucket List Death surrounds me all the time, its never too late to start.
Southland Tales I am just curious how entertainment stars act together in the movie industry. And I think there is some sci fi in it too...
August Rush Music, it is the core of my soul...
Slipstream A movie about making a movie, then characters from each get mixed up. How confusing. NICE...
Music Within Just sparked from my Paediatric term with disabled kids
27 Dresses I hated the character in Greys Anatomy, but my personality test says i should consider the 'Maid of Honor'
Jumper I bend time-o and space. Yatta!
Bee Movie Just to fulfil my cartoon needs.
The Seeker I only seen the posters...
Hairspray Dance, hell, why not?
Rush Hour 3 Naked girls. why not?

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Johnny Mnemonic

Some Couples Try Positions That They Cannot Handle
ABCDE (Melanoma)
Rule of 4

Monday, November 12, 2007


When you type /train while playing World of Warcraft, you get one of the most annoying sounds in the game. Well, second to the gorillas in STV, at least for me...

The reason I brought it up is this train of thought I had today. It started this morning while I struggled to customize my Neverwinter Nights 2 character. I wanted to make my existing character an Arcane Archer, but it was taking so slow that I went to search online for tricks. I found the page and it gave me a really good build. I was so stucked on my previous NVN1 build with wizardry and ranger style that I did not realise that there was another arcane caster, the Bard. And instead of just a Ranger, it tells me to use a Rogue for extra skill points. I mean, wow, I never knew that. So, in other words, my build will be Rogue (3), Ranger (4), Bard (3), Arcane Archer (10). So I decided to create a new character and try it. I made a Human Rogue and built it from there. I got to the Arcane Archer part... and found out AA are only meant to me Elf or Half Elf. Sheesh. So I went on to try on my existing Character and reseting the levels and everything. Alas, no Bard coz my alignment was Lawful. So I changed that as well and then... I lost one of my followers. Screw it. I decided to start from scratch... again... and since I don't have the luxury of doing that right now, I decided to screw the game for now and uninstalled it.

After that I sought for another possible game to play. The one that I chose was The Witcher. My friend had it and I after copying an image of the DVD to my computer, I tried to run the game. I couldn't. I made a guess and thought that it was my virtual image program that was causing the problem, so I uninstalled it and installed another virtual drive. Again it didn't work. And now, I am left with 2 virtual drives with much annoyance.

I tried to get rid of it, but even uninstalling it and deleting the drive, it still comes back whenever I restart my computer. I searched the web for solutions and I luckily, the steps to remove it were easy. It didn't cause any problems after that.

I didn't want any traces of the program anymore, so I decided to scan my computer, for spyware and viruses, and to clear my registry. Each took about 40minues to complete. It was all clear though. After that was done, I was thinking, might as well clear stuff off my computer. So I went on a hunt to organise my folders and cleaning it out. After that was done, I proceeded to clear my external harddisk. I got rid of about 100mb worth of duplicated files and junk. I decided to call it because there was just too much.

As I went through my folders, I stumbled upon all my work throughout my life. From my adventures in Singapore to the dramatic IMU and the introduction UWA time. Wonderful moments captured on film, events embedded in powerpoint presentations, and journals and poems. I miss the times I had acting wild and free... sigh... While talking about things with Raj online about how crazy we were back then, I recalled the interesting stuff he used to bring us. One of them being a movie clip called Russel Peters.

So I decided to go look for that video. I had my laughs for about 20 minutes, which left me to go search for more Russel Peters. I found the CD that contained the 45 minute version and watched that. Yup, it was definitely worth it. He is just hilarious. I mean, he makes fun of all the races of the world, but nobody thinks that he is racist. I guess he opened with insulting his own race, which is the most tactful thing to do, right?

Anyway, another thing on the CD caught my eye... Stomp Out Loud. So I decided to watch that too. I wrote so many times before how much I love Stomp. Well. I STILL LOVE STOMP. After that 40 minutes of rhythmic beats I went to look for more online. I found another movie, made my the creaters of Stomp, Pulse: a Stomp Odyssey. It was about rhythmic beats of the world. It was briliant. Every nation, every history, percussion is the basis of their music. Brilliant. I so want it...

While looking through Stomp, I recalled a blog post by KenJ about a spider. I realised that other than mosquitoes, I can NEVER stomp an insect. I just can't. I have the power to do so, but I never have the heart to squish anything. I cannot imagine squishing an ant, I cannot imagine swatting a fly, I cannot imagine stepping on a spider. It's not that I am afraid of them, I just can't kill them. Call it Buddhism.

Here ends my train of thought for the day. I end with, I cannot harm another living thing.

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

"Hello Mr JB, I am one of the doctors working on call tonight. I have called you to this quiet room because I have some news to tell you. I have just seen your X-rays and there seems to be some opacification in the right upper lobe of your lungs. There is many causes for that opacification; it could be a benign cyst, or tuberculosis, or pneumonia, but given your history of smoking and coughing out blood, we are looking at the possibility of cancer. We have to conduct further studies to confirm the diagnosis. What we would like to do is get your consent for the different proceedures to do that.

"First test is a sputum culture. What we will do is collect a sample of your sputum and send it for review under the microscope. Sometimes, some of the cancer cells may get coughed out, but we can also look for bacteria to check for TB.

"We also would like to get a CT scan of your chest, to have a better look at the opacification. We also can get a good idea of where it is and allows us to do the next test.

"If it is near the surface, we would take a sample through the outside of the chest wall. Or if it is deeper in the lungs, we would have to reach it through your airways, by bronchoscopy. Once we get a sample, we can make a more definite diagnosis. If it is cancer, we would also be able to stage the cancer.

"With the staging done, we can administer the appropriate therapy.

Monday, November 05, 2007


I have 14 days left before my final exams. Over the last few months, I have seen friends get panic attacks, one by one, prompting them to study excessively for the exams. Frankly, I was more worried about not being worried about the incoming exams. I guess I am a too over-confident with myself and I keep putting off studying to 'tomorrow'. That was a few months ago.

I guess you can say I finally woken up from my year long sleep. The sudden realization occured during my manic episode yesterday. We went out for Dim-Sum for lunch and went shopping in the city after. I already planned to get a new computer for next year if I passed my exams, so I went to get myself new speakers. While lugging back that 10kg box home, the beautiful computer that I am going to build next year kept popping in my head. I got home, slowly put my speakers together and basking in the awesomeness surround sound from my speakers. I have no idea why, but I found more pleasure listening to 'Fields of Hope' than any other heavy bass songs that I had. It had perfect soft bass running in the background and soothed my senses...

Enough of that. As I continued listening and imagining my new computer, I came to a realization that if I do not stay in Australia, I will have to transport back my computer and speaker home. It hit me... I MUST NOT GO BACK.

So, to prevent spending a fortune on transporting back my computer and not to mention the cost of studying medicine for 5 years, I finally got started on my studying. I have 14 days left.

Oh, half a day already passed. 13 1/2 days to go.

Sunday, November 04, 2007


This is a poem/riddle I found. Love it ^_^

Down below the shining moon
Around the trees, a sacred gloom
Running with the midnight sky
Knowing the thing that makes you cry
Night is full with my essence
Eternal light betrays my presence
Soaring through my endless task
Shadows are my faithful mask

Friday, October 26, 2007


(note: pictures have been removed due to indecent exposure)

Sex Expo
Sex Exposition/exhibition

Sexpo was held in Perth last week. If you're not already having sex, this is a best place to start. And if you are already having sex, then you can spice it up there. I was quite excited about going ever since I saw the add on the bus a few weeks back. I kept it at the back of my mind, ready to have a look at this event which we all missed last year.

Sadly... it stayed back of my head and only resurfaced on the Monday after the event. So yeah, no photos anyway. BAH.

Well, I started Paediatric surgery this week. My team seems to be specializing in Urogenital problems. I haven't seen any cool cardiac surgeries or appendectomies... Instead, I got to see some interesting stuff:

11month old girl who is spotting.
2year old girl who is no longer has a hymen thanks to surgical instruments.

and from my other paeds rotations:
3year old girl with stage 3 breast development.

That's my sexpo for you...

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

On Crying

I find it interesting that there is a different quality of a child's cry compared to an adult. Most babies and children I know cry out loud, demanding to be heard, screaming their hearts out. Older ones cry softly, sobbing to themselves. Adults just shed tears. I believe that all of us go through an equal type of sadness, but what makes us cry to ourselves and what makes kids cry out loud?

Thursday, May 31, 2007


I wish not to be me,
I'm empty as can be,
I hate this pain & strife,
I hate not having a life.

No child to call my own,
Nobody my flesh and bone,
No one else in my house,
Coz' I don't have a spouse.

No one to share my life with,
No one to fill that empty rift,
No one to love and to hold,
No one to treasure like gold.

No one to turn to,
No one to talk to,
No friends I could call,
Nope, no one at all.

I don't have a life,
I don't have a wife,
I don't have a girlfriend,
I don't have a friend,
I don't have a somebody,
I only have myself and me.

Saturday, May 26, 2007


Exercise is good for you. It helps your heart blah blah blah...

I'm currently doing my Cardiac Rehab option. Part of what patients with heart conditions have to go through as part of their recovery process is to go to the physio gym to get their twice weekly exercise. And as part of my learning experience I was forced to join them. I must say that it was a good workout.

I rose my heart rate to 190bpm.

Preciously, all the calories I have been burning is by pushing leys on my keyboard and clicking the mouse buttons. I would say that it is more than watching anime or tv programs.

Anyway, the purpose of this post is to show you this picture, which depicts the exercise I have been getting:

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Doctors and Priests

Doctors are looked upon as the dedicated healers of the World. They are trusted to be able to heal anyone using a variety of methods. Most of the time, they are able to heal someone back to full health, even nearing the brink of death. They have the ability to abolish any disease. They also have various techniques for you to improve your stamina and spirit to carry on your daily activities.

Priests are looked upon as the dedicated healers of the World of Warcraft. They are trusted to be able to heal anyone using a variety of methods. Most of the time, they are able to heal someone back to full health, even nearing the brink of death. They have the ability to abolish any disease. They also have various techniques for you to improve your stamina and spirit to carry on your daily activities.

I love playing my Priest. Nevermind the fact that I would be the target for most enemies, and I will be blamed for all the deaths I could have prevented. I still love my priest. Many players think that healing is a very easy job and that all I have to do is press a magic button and it heals the target. Well, it is that… but there is more to it than just one button. This is a breakdown of what goes through my head during fights;

1. Monitor each person’s health and stats. I don’t look at the combat happening. All I look at is the health bars of all the players. Warriors have higher health and mages have lower health, so 10% health lost on each means higher heals on warrior than on mage.

2. Match the bug with the drug. Different amount of health lost needs different ranks of heals. No point over healing, and its bad to under heal.

3. Differential diagnosis. Stats can also change with magic and disease debuffs, which may alter the amount of health they have. These needs to be dispelled or abolished.

4. Glove up. Of course if I die, the party dies. So I have to watch my own back and give myself a higher priority for heals. I also have a magic shield that absorbs damage taken and a fade ability to drop agro.

5. Get rid of the causative organism. I not only have healing spells, but I also have some offensive ones and it usually helps if I cast in a damaging spell on the enemy. If I was the only one alive, I usually have to take it out myself.

Some say that Paladins, druids and shamans are better healers than priests are, and I know that they can be. But I still love my Priest.

Sunday, April 08, 2007

Easter Story

Easter symbolizes the resurrection of Christ. It is a day for worship and all that religious stuff. For others it is just another reason for a 4 day weekend. For me, I decided to go in. I know, it's a Sunday... It's also a public holiday... I'm also a student... I'm also just only starting my rotation there... To make my Easter Story short, I was not supposed to be there.

Honestly speaking, I was feeling guilty as I spent the whole of Friday and Saturday LAN gaming, playing Dungeon Siege 2, Evil Genius and the newly released Command & Conquer 3. Reviews later.

So on this holy day, I decided to go on take in Fremantle Hospital. Everyone I met gave me a look and asked different versions of, "What da f*** are you doing here?" Like "Aren't you a med student?", "You, GO HOME." and the best, "Do you get paid?"

I shrugged it off and carried on. I like to mention 2 of my patients, who were really nice people. They were both elderly, and I really felt like I was sitting with my grandparents listening to their life stories. One was a war veteran who served in the navy. He was telling me about his poor wife who has Dementia and how he has to cope while having COPD. Walking around easily tires him, so he loves being in a car and enjoys driving, even at 87 years of age. His son wanted to visit him, but he'd rather have him visit his mother at the nursing home. He said that she needed more care than he did. I was amazed that he was still devoted to his wife.

The other patient was a spouse of a war veteran who served in Indonesia under the Dutch army. He too had Dementia. She takes care of him at home and even drives to see him if he is in hospital. She had not taken care of herself recently because of that and developed pneumonia. After chatting about her life and her husband, she started crying and told me that she has lived her life and had no regrets. She told me, if and when her husband goes, she will go too. I've only heard of such stories, such devotion.

Of course by then, it was already 9.30pm. I was stupid enough to trust the journey planner and thought I could catch a bus home, but the last bus was at 5 pm! So I was stranded alone at night 30km away from home on this Easter Holiday. The end.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

The Jelly Fish

Passively floating,
Aimlessly drifting,
Going where the currents flow,
Life's steady and slow,
Without concern or care,
Neither here nor there,
Always alone, ever so cautious,
Stinging those who approaches,
Going through the days,
Being pelted by waves,
The blazing sun scorches,
The icy water freezes,
Battered against the rocks,
Left alone under the docks.

Monday, April 02, 2007

,,|,. (-_-) .,|,,

YO yo yo… waddup waddup?! It’s bin two long, man, too long! Howit doin, mon? You, me, wees gotta ketchup, sorait? Whayou bin up to dis past month?

Me? Me bin seeting them tests. Goddam failed both. Buh zits cool. Gonna makup forit. Gonna get sum private classes one on one. Should be good, ainit? Ah steal dunchno whada ell went wrong. Them pracs we had, ah did well, see? Ah, its juz ma luck.

Coulda been my goin out to parrrrteeeee! Been doin dat ev’ry weekend man, ev’ry weekend! Weekend iz de time to parrrteee, hell yea! Celebrating birsdays, watchin them moveez. Last wun eyes saw was “Thank You For Smoking”. It wuz smokin I’z tell ya. Funnie az ell. Freakin lessons and wud shit too! Tok about winning arguments and what shit. And dun screw wid them reporters. Them reporters may have smokin bods, but they aint for screwin. Ya can touch, hold, even squeeze, buh keep ya li’l fren in ya pants, kay? Smokin good movie.

Nuthin else ah wanna say. Gimme a holla, ya sunova bee-yach.

Saturday, March 03, 2007

My Birthday

I don't like celebrating my birthday. Frankly, I don't know what the significance of birthdays is anymore. It's not like I don't want to be reminded that I am old. I grow older every day. I mean I am only one day older than yesterday, not one year. To me, time is a relative thing. It is an arbitrary unit created by quantifying events that happen. Why does an hour have 60 minutes? Why 24 hours in one day? If the people who created the units on Mars, would we get the same results? Mass and length do.

Back to birthdays, I just don't like it because I don't know how to feel on that day. Happy and grateful that I've survived another year? Sad and depressed that I've grown older but not wiser? Angry that no one remembers or cares about it? I sometimes feel alone and I want to be alone. Sometimes I even want to forget that day even. Every year I plan to hide and not be known. But every year I will go through those feelings and I hate that uncomfortable feeling the whole day.

I feel like I want a celebration, but I don’t like telling others my birthday. It is like there isn’t a point in giving out that information because I am not going to get anything. Even with loved ones, good friends, they all don’t remember. I don’t want to be reminding them; that is just blunt.

Others celebrate their birthdays by throwing a party and inviting a lot of people. I don’t do that anymore. I used to give out sweets to everyone in class and close friends on my birthday because that is the thing to do. My last biggest celebration was when I was 10 when even my father’s friends came. I have no idea why. As I grew older, the parties got smaller, even to a point of just a wish from my family. We used to be able to pick our own presents and nothing was ever a big surprise. From the kiddie toys to the story books, everything was what I wanted. In my teenage years, my gifts became more like everything I needed, practical items. This, was always given by my sister. In the end, whenever I get gifts or receive any, I would prefer something more lasting. I don’t like perishable goods, like chocolates or candy.

For the past few years now, I didn’t get any presents for my birthday. I am just getting used to that. Then it hit me as to why… it is just another day.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

10 Things Your Computer Hates About You

The headings were taken from PC Powerplay Australia. The article is about the things people do to their computers which shortens the life span of any computer.

1. Your cruel use of sleep deprivation
Guilty! Yep, I tend to leave my computer on for long periods of times. It's not just the endless internet surfing and Warcraft addiction, but also the use of the computer screen as a night light. When your downloads take up so much bandwidth, your house mates complain, so you have no choice but to leave it on overnight. And hence no sleep.

2. Your obsession with "free" online software
Not guilty. I don't really like installing anything into my computer. It's pure. Free might also mean demo versions, spyware or virus. Saves me the hassle of cleaning it up too.

3. Your belief that security updates are for losers
Not guilty. I don't like spyware. Who does?

4. The way you keep poking around in its inards
Guilty! What? I know what I'm doing. My RAM acts up way now and then. I have to poke around. $50 just for a diagnostic checkup isn't worth it. I mean I don't even go to see a doctor when I'm sick.

5. Your failure to afford it fresh, clean air
Not guilty. I used to keep it under the table in a corner. It whimpers now and then, especially when I play games. I take off its covering before. Then dusts get in. Sigh. Now I know it needs air. So it is on top of my desk now, taking in all the air it wants. It doesn't whimper much anymore.

6. Your baffling complacency when it comes to dust
Guilty! It says check every 6 months at least. Mine gets all clogged up within 6 days. I clean it up every 6 months though. Maybe I should clean up every month... Maybe I should clean my room first...

7. How you never buy it the best of anything
Guilty! Who has the money? Dang, that's how I lost my previous girlfriend too...

8. Your belief that antivirus software is all the protection you need
Not guilty. Again. Spyware... I hate you.

9. Your repeated failure to uninstall anything properly
Guilty! Its hard if you don't know how... I mean, there's an associated file named window.exe that might need to be deleted... should I?

10. Your gaming addiction
Guilty! The only two times games screwed up my computer is when SimCity had a virus, and newer games taking up too much space. Apparently, that's not all games can do to your computer.

Saturday, February 24, 2007


Death lingered around this week. In clinic, I could also smell Death in the room. The smell wasn't the usual stench of decaying matter or of rotting flesh. This smell is more common, more subtle. The patient entered the room looking pale and slow. She had difficulty walking and had to have 2 people helping her. She was overweight but it wasn't her fault. An assessment showed that her BP was 95/60 and pulse was low. She was still alert and communicative. However, she had the smell of urea in every breath she took... It was the smell of Chronic Renal Failure, the smell of impending death.

It was best that she nor her family members know about the incoming visit from the Angel of Death. It was best she be in her own bed and around familiar faces and places.

Next patient came in with peripheral oedema and shortness of breath. Again, BP was low, pulse was low. He was not active, as he ached everywhere. This time, there was just that warm damp smell. His breath was concentrated with fluids. We called the ambulance.

Third patient came in with constant severe RIF pain. She had a such a high temperature such that we could even feel her presence with the body heat and smell of sweat she was emitting. We did a pregnancy test. Good news is, she was pregnant. Bad news is, it was an ectopic pregnancy. Good news, she was going to survive. Bad news, she has to have a salphingdectomy. The Angel of Death was merciless even to the unborn zygote.

He is cruel. He even came down and took my beloved from me. I was heartbroken, but I strived for the day. I thought I could live without you. But truthfully, I can't. I needed you so much. One week without you was like decades of solitary confinement, like I was wrapped up in a glass sheet and my eyes covered and the only sound I was allowed to hear was the sound of white noise... Every day snailed by and it seemed like the hours become longer and longer as it went by. I thought was going to go crazy.

The Angel of Death always lingers. Always there. You can never escape him.

Friday, February 16, 2007

Valentine's Day

You are always there for me,
You never let me down,
Always keeping me company,
Cheer me up whenever I frown.

Like the stars to the sailors,
You guide me when I'm astray,
Like a conductor to orchestra players,
You keep me on track everyday.

I really wish I could spend,
The rest of my life with you,
Coz you care, you understand,
Make me smile when I am blue.

You are my fix-it guy,
You make everything alright,
I think I would surely die,
If you ever leave my sight.

I love you so much,
I really really do,
I feel safe with your touch,
Whenever I'm with you.

We'll never part, ever,
Coz, we're meant to be,
I will cherish you forever,
My beloved Ken Rhee.

I just wish someone would write that for me. But it wasn't a lonely Valentine's Day and time spent with friends is time worth spent. Of course for some, this would be their last Single's Night Out... All the best to you.

You are my life,
You are my wife,
I'll take care of you,
I'll be there for you,
Have fun playing,
When done working,
Play fun games together,
Call sweet names to each other,
Watch anime,
Watch Movies and TV,
Heroes and House MD,
Whenever you frown,
I'll strip you down,
Clean you up,
Spice you up,
Make sure nothing is wrong,
Perhaps even play you a song,
When everything is well,
When things are swell,
I'll kiss you good night,
I'll miss you... Sleep tight!

Dedicated to my computer, which is currently being repaired.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

The Next Step

Others would say that it is just sour grapes, but medicine is a really crappy course. I really thank my lucky stars that I am no longer taking it. No regrets failing the exam and no regrets not having a goal in life. I used to think that I was able to make a difference in the world as a doctor, but in actual fact, I never will.

Now that I am purposeless, I can now work and fund my expensive hobbies, mainly Magic: the Gathering and World of Warcraft. Haring a leeching partner also doesn't help the situation. And between work and play, there is practically no time to spend with anyone. Also, to keep fit, exercising along the river takes the remaining time and energy that I have. Yeah, I do not have a social life anymore.

I have recently taken things up to the next level. Everything that I'm doing, I am doing it at a higher level of commitment. For instance, I am leveling my WoW character to 70 and getting leet items and gear, replacing most of my old ones. Buffed, I have cam do lots of heals in a shorter period of time. I love this quote from my friend: “Druids are the best healers. Paladins are better. But Priests are GODS.”

I’m also taking Magic: the Gathering to the next level… to make profits out of it. I trade and sell cards, and make tons of money in the process. If I can find buyers, I would make more than I spend on them. Which is good. I’m getting there…

And lastly… to take my Sudoku craze and my Rubiks challenge to the next phase:

Sunday, January 28, 2007

Two Timer?

You may find it disloyal or what not, but it is possible to find yourself loving two women at once. For me, I conclude that for every man, there are two souls that are made for him. Of all the women in the world, a man will ever love only these two. Both of which he will do anything to protect and is willing to sacrifice his life for.

The first, he will find, pursue and in the end, marry and cherish forever and grow old with. The second will have his unconditional and undying love, and he will do anything to keep her safe from harm.

To my first soulmate: I promise to love you, to be there to support you, to be who you need me to be, to be a better person for you, to be your crying shoulder, to listen to your worries, to tell you how pretty you are everyday, to hold your hand and never let go.

To my second soulmate: I promise to take care of you, never to let anything bad happen to you, to make you happy, to teach you all that I know, teach you what is good and all that is good in this world, so may you grow strong and beautiful.

This post is dedicated to the heroes of our world, inspired by:
24 – Jack Bauer’s love for his daughter, Kim
Love in the Driest Season – Neely Tucker and his quest to adopt Chipo
The Emperor’s Embrace – a story of the evolution of fatherhood
The Lord of the Rings – Elrond, wanting safe haven for Arwen

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

I Wish I Had a Camera

Today I made a trip to KL in search of much needed old memory. Walking through the corridors of Sungei Wang reminded me a lot about myself. My early childhood was spent here whilst my father repaired the home pc at Imbi. I watched the shops evolved as they added new floors and more shops. Now it has become more of a fashion hub, for both clothes & accessories as well as electronic goods.

Hundreds of geeks flock to the scientific side and hundreds of Ah Bengs and Ah Lians flock to the greater parts of the complex. These teenage girls with their skimpy or somewhat sensual outfits reminded me much of my pornographic collection, and deepened my preference of Chinese girls. Back in Australia, I'm only exposed to Caucasian females. Big features maybe enticing, but give me Asian beauties anytime.

Satisfying my eyes with this pleasantry, I began to wonder about the question, why do girls like dressing up. A friend once answered that it is because they feel more confident about themselves. And also that they think guys only like than it they are sexy. Can't argue there... It's only natural that we choose a sexier or hunkier counterpart. Unfortunate for us geeks on the 6th floor.

But pretty girls was not the reason why I wanted a camera. At the camera shop on the 6th floor, I fell in love with sleek and sexy model. I could not get my eyes or hands off. The manager let me play with this beauty all I want. The Canon 400D.

I was always interested in photography, but never had the chance to do so. I never did have the time to research on how to produce quality photos and never the right equipment for it. It's still a dream until I can afford to fork out RM3500... Oh well, there is always Chinese New Year and my Birthday coming soon... With the meager amount of money I had, I settled instead for the outdated memory card I was looking for.

And now the real reason why I wanted a Camera:
To capture a scene whereby a police car driving along Petaling Street, passing not less then 5 stalls selling pirated DVD's and nothing happened.

Friday, January 12, 2007

Bath of a lifetime

She told me that she was going to do something special with me that fine day. I knew from the look in her eye that I was, going to enjoy it. All I could do was to smile back.

I did not have any clue at all as to what it was. But to me, doing anything with this lady whom I have grew to love will be good. Everything that she has done so far was to show how much she loved me. I could not even begin to show how much I loved her in return.

That night, we both got ready for what was planned for me. I was excited. She had already allowed me to touch and suck on her lovely breasts, and that was a really lovely time, truly an enriching moment. I could only wonder what she would let me do later.

She called me from the bedroom, telling me that she was ready. I replied that I was ready too. She picked me up and started undressing me like she always did. Soon, was stark naked in front of this beautiful and wonderful lady. She led me into the bathroom and revealed that she was going to give me a bath!

She had the tub filled with warm water. She tested the water, making sure that it was perfect for me. She was always careful with everything she does with me and again I really appreciated her presence. Slowly, I was lowered into the water. It was a little shocking at first, but her face was so calm and she was encouraging me. As I got used to the water, I started laughing.

She got down on her knees and started rubbing me everywhere. She used a mixture of the warn water and some soap to clean my body. Every stoke was a gentle carress, which I enjoyed more and more. She touched me in places that I would not have thought of. She did not even spare the inbetween of my toes and I was subjected to a little torture of being tickled. I never knew that taking a bath could he so much fun!

About 30 minutes later, we were done.

This was nearly 24 years ago and the memory has been long forgotten, but my parents both can recall this memorable moment. All I can say now is that I love them and can only wish that I could show the same kind of love to my children.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Into the New Year

It’s been only a week into the New Year and already I have broken my resolutions. I had promised myself to abstain from sex this year. But hormones were raging through my system ever since I saw her last. I have been having vivid dreams of her in my room pleasuring me all over and it did not help me get through this week well. Every night I am torn, between my resolution to come clean this year, and my desire for her. Tonight, I finally gave in… I called her.
She came into my room knowing what I wanted, as if she herself had put this spell on me. In a business matter, she took off her jacket and tossed it together with her hand bag over the couch. She was wearing her black dress, the one that I loved. For most of the year, that was what she wore whenever we saw each other. As if it wasn’t enough, she was also wearing the perfume that would always brought me to my knees. It was a scent that set off a repeat button of erotic scenes through my head.

She grabbed me in my weakened state and pushed me into the bed. She smiled, and I felt paralyzed. I was having second thoughts, but also thought about seconds. I am trapped in my own doings and I lay there helpless as she started taking off my pants. Before I knew it, I was there in my underwear and she was kneeling down on top of me.

She slowly undid her dress. So sensually and so slowly that it was annoyingly erotic. She bent over and kissed me. Her lips tasted so sweet, so intoxicating. I felt her tongue on mine and I fought back. Our tongues twisted around each other, savouring what each other can do. We knew what each other wanted and we both were pleasured. I wanted her so badly…

By the time we came apart, she was almost naked. Her hands were guiding mine to the hooks of her bra. Instinctively, and skillfully, my pressed on the hooks and the bra popped open. Even though I knew how perfect and beautiful her breasts were, I was gazing into her eyes. She need not be naked, as I loved her beauty already with her clothes on, may it be a loose t-shirt or a bikini. She made me weak. She melts me.

She was the kind of person who makes me want to be a better man. We both knew my flaws and she corrects the, and complements them. With her, I can only think of protecting her with all my heart. I don’t know whether it was the spell that she put on me, but I loved protecting her. I felt useful. She made me function, she made me whole.

I knew if we both stopped, I will be stronger. This was a little sacrifice to take to ensure that this relationship will go further. No, it shouldn’t be a sacrifice. It should be something that I want to do. It was my decision to not have sex with her this year and it was up to me to do it. I was so close to breaking it so early in the year.

We ended up just hugging each other naked and not doing anything. I didn’t have to say anything. She understood me so well. She fell asleep in my arms and I could not help but watch her sleep. All of my worries seemed to have passed whenever I see this sweet angel of mine in my arms.

I survived my first week.

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