I feel that most apocalyptic movies try to potray different aspects of the end of times, mostly the good human qualities such as honour, justice, heroism, self-sacrifice... But 2012 showed many other real human reactions. Despite the cheesey storyline and exagerated graphics (which were still cool), I acually kind of like it.
How would you handle the end of days? Living life as there is no tomorrow? Drowning yourself in indulgence? Taking your own life to prove that you are stil in control? Doing what is good and right until the end? Congregate en mass in prayer? Make amends with long lost relationsships? Spending every last seconds with someone you love and care about?
What are you willing to do before the end? What are you willing to give in order to survive?
In 2012, they could only save a selected few. Who would you choose? This was like selecting the 23 people for the next Zion in the Matrix. You would want the brightest scientists, best leaders... I would also think they will select workers and fit and healthy people. But in reality, to undertake such a project, they needed so much funding that they have to sell seats to the rich and famous as well. And some of the rich and famous are not nice people... I felt that it became more of a political, business-like situation, which tickles me a lot.
It was so also hilariously iconic to see cameos of famous figures. Imagine a moderately obese lady with in a blue English schoolgirl outfit and matching blue bowler hat, carrying a big typically old lady handbag dragging her 2 Welsh Corgie dogs. Imagine an Autrian sounding blond in front of a podium annoucing to the people of LA that everything is alright.
Anyway, there were also many miniscule plots which at first I thought just wasted time, but actually potrayed these human reactions and added to my experience of the show. They could have done more destruction and less of the adventure stuff in the movie.
There were also many interpretations of the movie which I found interesting. Like how the 3 major developed continents (save Australia); North America, Europe, and Asia were the ones that made it... just like Christopher Columbus and his 3 ships found America... and how they ended up going to Africa, where human life first begin...
Concurrently, this movie just reminds me of my last two weeks here. It was all about goodbyes. I would probably never see any of my friends here in Perth anymore, not for a very long time. I hate to say goodbye to the people I care about. I said too many goodbyes these last two weeks. I am exhausted with all emotions that I have been feeling. I wish that we all can be in same ark, to start our new working lives together... I don't know what I would give to have that.
I will miss all of you...
Monday, November 30, 2009
Thursday, November 12, 2009
FlashForwards
What if you had a glimpse of your future, down to the very feeling you will be having at that point in time? What if you felt so sure that this ‘future’ you experienced will come true? Would you strive your best to achieve that ‘future’? Or would you do whatever you can to prevent it from coming true? Or would you just let time runs its course?
Is our future set in stone, with every second of our lives already been predetermined? Or does our future change depend on what we do? Does everything we do determine what effect will happen in the future and what we do is an effect of what happened in the past? Is the future then, theoretically calculatable with all the factors, internal and external, considered?
Can time not be a linear progression? Or is it an ever diverging multiverse, creating alternate universes where different scenarios are occurring?
All of these questions arose in my head just by watching the first 10 minutes of the show FlashForward.
Everyone in the world experienced the world in 6 months time, and with all the information gathered, they were painting a mosaic of what it would be like. Everyone could log in, share their experience and affirm what other people have posted, and creating a clear picture of the future.
Sounds easy enough, but what the show constantly debates about is whether this future is the real future or just a possibility of a future, or just a dream... I am intrigued about the idea of time travelling, may it be via a modified Delorean, or a stationary machine with a window for which you can watch time pass you by. However when it comes to the age old paradox of, “If you travelled back through time and killed your grandfather, would you be born to commit such an act?” and “If time travel is possible, why haven’t we seen anyone from the future?” I have a hard time taking a stand.
On the one hand, I like the idea of linearity, everything that will happen, has happened. Getting a visit from a future you means you will be going back to visit in the future. You won’t be able to kill your grandfather no matter what you tried, and your grandfather can tell you of the tale that someone tried to kill him. I like the idea of Chaos Theory, Butterfly Effect, or Ripple Effect, where one small event would have sequential causes and effects which eventually leads us to where we all are now, and will continue to cascade to our futures. It does also get depressing when you think about it, that whatever happened in the future, will happen and there is nothing you can do about it. In other words, whatever you have done or are doing, it will lead up to that future.
On the other hand, I wish that time travelling can happen, so that we can ascertain the truth about what happened in the past. Is the earth really 6 billion years old? Did the chicken come first? Did Sam really steal my crayon? I also wish that I can travel to the future, just for curiosity.
The closest possible technology I can think of to allow time travelling is cryonics. Of course it doesn’t work the other way around…
Anyway, it doesn’t stop me from wanting to know my future in 6 months time, even if it is just for 2 minutes and 17 seconds.
May this series fare better light than Lost is now…
Is our future set in stone, with every second of our lives already been predetermined? Or does our future change depend on what we do? Does everything we do determine what effect will happen in the future and what we do is an effect of what happened in the past? Is the future then, theoretically calculatable with all the factors, internal and external, considered?
Can time not be a linear progression? Or is it an ever diverging multiverse, creating alternate universes where different scenarios are occurring?
All of these questions arose in my head just by watching the first 10 minutes of the show FlashForward.
Everyone in the world experienced the world in 6 months time, and with all the information gathered, they were painting a mosaic of what it would be like. Everyone could log in, share their experience and affirm what other people have posted, and creating a clear picture of the future.
Sounds easy enough, but what the show constantly debates about is whether this future is the real future or just a possibility of a future, or just a dream... I am intrigued about the idea of time travelling, may it be via a modified Delorean, or a stationary machine with a window for which you can watch time pass you by. However when it comes to the age old paradox of, “If you travelled back through time and killed your grandfather, would you be born to commit such an act?” and “If time travel is possible, why haven’t we seen anyone from the future?” I have a hard time taking a stand.
On the one hand, I like the idea of linearity, everything that will happen, has happened. Getting a visit from a future you means you will be going back to visit in the future. You won’t be able to kill your grandfather no matter what you tried, and your grandfather can tell you of the tale that someone tried to kill him. I like the idea of Chaos Theory, Butterfly Effect, or Ripple Effect, where one small event would have sequential causes and effects which eventually leads us to where we all are now, and will continue to cascade to our futures. It does also get depressing when you think about it, that whatever happened in the future, will happen and there is nothing you can do about it. In other words, whatever you have done or are doing, it will lead up to that future.
On the other hand, I wish that time travelling can happen, so that we can ascertain the truth about what happened in the past. Is the earth really 6 billion years old? Did the chicken come first? Did Sam really steal my crayon? I also wish that I can travel to the future, just for curiosity.
The closest possible technology I can think of to allow time travelling is cryonics. Of course it doesn’t work the other way around…
Anyway, it doesn’t stop me from wanting to know my future in 6 months time, even if it is just for 2 minutes and 17 seconds.
May this series fare better light than Lost is now…
Tuesday, November 03, 2009
Exams
I used to know a lot of things. I even called myself ‘Jack of all Trades, Master or None,’ because I know a little about everything, but nothing more than that. I cannot claim something to be my forte. But even now, I cannot claim the title of ‘Jack.’
Of course I haven’t been reading as much as I used to, indulging myself in trivial entertainment. There is simply too much to know about everything. I am guessing that there is more studying needed to know a little about everything than to study a particular subject.
Which brings me to the point, I need to study. My exams are just a few days away.
Anyways, it is not stopping me from planning for after exam activities, which mainly include visual entertainment. This is a list of movies that are I want to watch (in no particular order):
the informant
daybreakers
astroboy
up in the air
from paris with love
a christmas carol
alice in wonderland
couples retreat
9
did you hear about the morgans
transylmania
fame
fantastic mr fox
the vampire's assistant
pandorum
avatar
cloudy with a chance of meatballs
new moon
one good man
adventures of power
julie and julia
blind date
white on rice
peter and vandy
inception
gentlemen broncos
the boys are back
pretty ugly people
the box
gamer
armored
the men who stared at goats
the lovely bones
the blind side
the wolfman
untitled
the forth kind
youth in revolt
brief interviews with hideious men
how to seduce difficult women
book of eli
toy story 3
law abiding citizen
precious
black dynamite
you cant handle the tooth
oh my god
invictus
bad lieutenant
serious moonlight
the flying scissors
valentine's day
humble pie
uncertainty
the imaginarium of doctor parnassus
takers
the messenger
that evening sun
stan helsing
bull
amelia
splinterheadsthe road
everybody's fine
motherhood
love
Now, back to studying.
Of course I haven’t been reading as much as I used to, indulging myself in trivial entertainment. There is simply too much to know about everything. I am guessing that there is more studying needed to know a little about everything than to study a particular subject.
Which brings me to the point, I need to study. My exams are just a few days away.
Anyways, it is not stopping me from planning for after exam activities, which mainly include visual entertainment. This is a list of movies that are I want to watch (in no particular order):
the informant
daybreakers
astroboy
up in the air
from paris with love
a christmas carol
alice in wonderland
couples retreat
9
did you hear about the morgans
transylmania
fame
fantastic mr fox
the vampire's assistant
pandorum
avatar
cloudy with a chance of meatballs
new moon
one good man
adventures of power
julie and julia
blind date
white on rice
peter and vandy
inception
gentlemen broncos
the boys are back
pretty ugly people
the box
gamer
armored
the men who stared at goats
the lovely bones
the blind side
the wolfman
untitled
the forth kind
youth in revolt
brief interviews with hideious men
how to seduce difficult women
book of eli
toy story 3
law abiding citizen
precious
black dynamite
you cant handle the tooth
oh my god
invictus
bad lieutenant
serious moonlight
the flying scissors
valentine's day
humble pie
uncertainty
the imaginarium of doctor parnassus
takers
the messenger
that evening sun
stan helsing
bull
amelia
splinterheadsthe road
everybody's fine
motherhood
love
Now, back to studying.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
An Excerpt
...At first I could not accept your reasons for leaving me. You meant the world to me. I give you everything I had and I would even bring back a piece of the moon if you asked me to. I gave you my heart, but all you did was to stab it with a rusting serrated knife. It hurts so much when you left me. You created in me a big gaping void that I cannot fill up. I have tried everything, but I only seem to have made it even bigger.
You left me in a blazing desert, under the scorching sun. I feel like a dried up pile of bones with no will to carry on. All I can see are illusions of you in the horizon, illusions that I cannot reach even if I tried. Even when the sun sets, I am stranded in the cold lonely night. My tears have all dried up, and I cannot sleep with the feeling of sand in every crevace of my body. I feel like my blood had also turned to sand, making my heart ache with every beat. I tried hating you for leaving me this way, but I cannot blame you for it. I am my own fault, and you deserve better.
I am pathetic. I am tired of crying all night and bothering the people I know. They would eventually leave me, just like you did. I am all alone with no one to care about me. I long for a gentle hug, but nobody would even approach this hideous fiend that I have become. I don’t even recognize my face in the mirror anymore. The loneliness is already eating me, like an overpowering shadow creeping up on me, taking every sense of light that once gave me hope.
I have no more hope. I have no more feelings. I am numb, and I hate being this way. I am drowning in the dark waters, not being able to see which side is up, but I can feel that I am sinking deeper and deeper into the dark chasm. I am suffocating; every breath I take is saturated with poisonous fumes and every breath I give, I feel like a part of me is leaving. I cannot see the light anymore.
I know nobody would notice if I am gone. Even if they do, they would probably find a replacement in an instant. I've done my best, but it is never enough. I am dispensable and I feel like an overused, crumpled up piece of scrap paper at the bottom of the rubbish bin. I find myself waiting for the incinerator to turn on, to finally end my pathetic life. I really don’t see a point in living anymore.
There is nothing left for me in this world. I have lost my purpose. I am a failure. I cannot keep up with even the simplest of tasks. I feel stupid. I hear my conscience telling me that I should keep trying, but I know that it is pointless to continue. Everything that I have done has gone unnoticed or ridiculed. There is always something wrong, and I can never make anyone happy, especially you. I am just wasting everyone's time by being here. The world will be a better place without me in it.
The closest analogy that I can think to explain how I feel is like I am being mauled by a lion. I am contemplating proving that theory. It would be soothing to know that I would be in the company of the creatures I admire, but I do not deserve to be happy when I die. I deserve more unforgiving pain for my failures...
~This is purely a fictional writing. Any resemblance to person(s) contemplating or have already committed suicide is purely co-incidental.
You left me in a blazing desert, under the scorching sun. I feel like a dried up pile of bones with no will to carry on. All I can see are illusions of you in the horizon, illusions that I cannot reach even if I tried. Even when the sun sets, I am stranded in the cold lonely night. My tears have all dried up, and I cannot sleep with the feeling of sand in every crevace of my body. I feel like my blood had also turned to sand, making my heart ache with every beat. I tried hating you for leaving me this way, but I cannot blame you for it. I am my own fault, and you deserve better.
I am pathetic. I am tired of crying all night and bothering the people I know. They would eventually leave me, just like you did. I am all alone with no one to care about me. I long for a gentle hug, but nobody would even approach this hideous fiend that I have become. I don’t even recognize my face in the mirror anymore. The loneliness is already eating me, like an overpowering shadow creeping up on me, taking every sense of light that once gave me hope.
I have no more hope. I have no more feelings. I am numb, and I hate being this way. I am drowning in the dark waters, not being able to see which side is up, but I can feel that I am sinking deeper and deeper into the dark chasm. I am suffocating; every breath I take is saturated with poisonous fumes and every breath I give, I feel like a part of me is leaving. I cannot see the light anymore.
I know nobody would notice if I am gone. Even if they do, they would probably find a replacement in an instant. I've done my best, but it is never enough. I am dispensable and I feel like an overused, crumpled up piece of scrap paper at the bottom of the rubbish bin. I find myself waiting for the incinerator to turn on, to finally end my pathetic life. I really don’t see a point in living anymore.
There is nothing left for me in this world. I have lost my purpose. I am a failure. I cannot keep up with even the simplest of tasks. I feel stupid. I hear my conscience telling me that I should keep trying, but I know that it is pointless to continue. Everything that I have done has gone unnoticed or ridiculed. There is always something wrong, and I can never make anyone happy, especially you. I am just wasting everyone's time by being here. The world will be a better place without me in it.
The closest analogy that I can think to explain how I feel is like I am being mauled by a lion. I am contemplating proving that theory. It would be soothing to know that I would be in the company of the creatures I admire, but I do not deserve to be happy when I die. I deserve more unforgiving pain for my failures...
~This is purely a fictional writing. Any resemblance to person(s) contemplating or have already committed suicide is purely co-incidental.
Friday, October 09, 2009
Its better to have love lost, than to have never loved at all... BUT...
Should I smile because you're my friend? Or cry because that is all we will ever be?
There are times when I can't decide whether to see you or not, I want to see you because I miss you but there are times when I don't want to see you because everytime I do, the fact that you don't see me the way that I see you hurts me even more...
A million words would not bring you back, I know because I've tried.
Neither would a million tears, I know because I've cried.
Forget the times you walked by,
Forget the times you've made me cry,
Forget the time you held my hand,
Forget the sweet things if I can,
I can no longer pretend,
I have to remember now that you're just a friend.
When I look at you my heart skips a beat but later that beat could mean a lifetime of tears wasted on something I knew I could never have
How can you be friends with someone if every time you look at them it makes you want them even more?
My heart was taken by you, broken by you and now is in pieces because of you
Its hard to tell your mind to stop loving someone if your heart still does.
Even when I pour my heart out to you, I'm not sure it shows, that I love you more than you'll ever know.
Sometimes it's hard to love someone because you're so afraid of losing them
I was reborn when you first kissed me. Part of me died when you left me. But now I still live, waiting for the day you return to me.
The hardest part of dreaming about someone you love is having to wake up.
There is one pain I often feel which you will never know because it is caused by the absence of you.
Who do you turn to when the only person who can stop you from crying is the one who is making you cry?
I understand that with loves comes pain, but why did I have to love so much?
The part that hurts me the most, is knowing that I once had you and then lost you...
The worst feeling in the world is giving all the love you have and knowing it will never be returned.
Its hard to pretend you love someone when you don't but its harder to pretend that you don't love someone when you really do.
How do you heal a broken heart? I have no idea where to start because everything I do reminds me of you.
Have you ever noticed that the worst way to miss someone is when they are right beside you and you can never have them?
As I sat here I was trying to think of all the times you hurt me and made me cry... Hoping and wishing it would make me like you less. But it didn't. Because all the times I could remember were the ones when you showed me that you cared... I didn't want to believe that you ever did. You walk by me everyday and say hello. Everyday you take time out to listen to me. You talk to me, smile at me, laugh with me, and have fun with me. Well, I talk, smile and laugh too, but inside I'm hurting. Deep down it hurts to be with you because I love you and you are only a friend.
The weirdest thing happened the other morning... I woke up with tears in my eyes... and one rolling down my cheek... and I knew I must have been dreaming of you again.
I'm not supposed to love you, I'm not supposed to care,I'm not supposed to live my life wishing you were there, I'm not supposed to wonder where you are and what to do, I'm sorry I can't help myself, I'm in love with you.
You're not worth the tears, you're not worth the heartache. I don't know why I give you the time. You're not worth the pain, you're not worth the emptiness. I don't know why I wish you were mine.
One day you'll ask me, "which is more important to you, me or your life" I'll say, "My life" and you'll go and leave me with out knowing that you are my life...
I'm sorry for crying over you, because I said I wouldn't. But I didn't promise you that, because I knew it would be a promise I would never be able to keep.
Nothing hurts more than realising she meant everything to you, but you meant nothing to her.
Never say "I love you" if you don't really care,
Never talk about feeling if they aren't really there.
Never hold my hand if you're going to break my heart.
Never say you're to, if you never plan to start.
Never look into my eyes if all you do is lie.
Never say hello, if you really mean goodbye.
If you really mean forever, then say you will try.
Never say forever 'cause forever makes me cry.
Taken from Really Sad Love Quotes
Inspired to collect by (500) Days of Summer
There are times when I can't decide whether to see you or not, I want to see you because I miss you but there are times when I don't want to see you because everytime I do, the fact that you don't see me the way that I see you hurts me even more...
A million words would not bring you back, I know because I've tried.
Neither would a million tears, I know because I've cried.
Forget the times you walked by,
Forget the times you've made me cry,
Forget the time you held my hand,
Forget the sweet things if I can,
I can no longer pretend,
I have to remember now that you're just a friend.
When I look at you my heart skips a beat but later that beat could mean a lifetime of tears wasted on something I knew I could never have
How can you be friends with someone if every time you look at them it makes you want them even more?
My heart was taken by you, broken by you and now is in pieces because of you
Its hard to tell your mind to stop loving someone if your heart still does.
Even when I pour my heart out to you, I'm not sure it shows, that I love you more than you'll ever know.
Sometimes it's hard to love someone because you're so afraid of losing them
I was reborn when you first kissed me. Part of me died when you left me. But now I still live, waiting for the day you return to me.
The hardest part of dreaming about someone you love is having to wake up.
There is one pain I often feel which you will never know because it is caused by the absence of you.
Who do you turn to when the only person who can stop you from crying is the one who is making you cry?
I understand that with loves comes pain, but why did I have to love so much?
The part that hurts me the most, is knowing that I once had you and then lost you...
The worst feeling in the world is giving all the love you have and knowing it will never be returned.
Its hard to pretend you love someone when you don't but its harder to pretend that you don't love someone when you really do.
How do you heal a broken heart? I have no idea where to start because everything I do reminds me of you.
Have you ever noticed that the worst way to miss someone is when they are right beside you and you can never have them?
As I sat here I was trying to think of all the times you hurt me and made me cry... Hoping and wishing it would make me like you less. But it didn't. Because all the times I could remember were the ones when you showed me that you cared... I didn't want to believe that you ever did. You walk by me everyday and say hello. Everyday you take time out to listen to me. You talk to me, smile at me, laugh with me, and have fun with me. Well, I talk, smile and laugh too, but inside I'm hurting. Deep down it hurts to be with you because I love you and you are only a friend.
The weirdest thing happened the other morning... I woke up with tears in my eyes... and one rolling down my cheek... and I knew I must have been dreaming of you again.
I'm not supposed to love you, I'm not supposed to care,I'm not supposed to live my life wishing you were there, I'm not supposed to wonder where you are and what to do, I'm sorry I can't help myself, I'm in love with you.
You're not worth the tears, you're not worth the heartache. I don't know why I give you the time. You're not worth the pain, you're not worth the emptiness. I don't know why I wish you were mine.
One day you'll ask me, "which is more important to you, me or your life" I'll say, "My life" and you'll go and leave me with out knowing that you are my life...
I'm sorry for crying over you, because I said I wouldn't. But I didn't promise you that, because I knew it would be a promise I would never be able to keep.
Nothing hurts more than realising she meant everything to you, but you meant nothing to her.
Never say "I love you" if you don't really care,
Never talk about feeling if they aren't really there.
Never hold my hand if you're going to break my heart.
Never say you're to, if you never plan to start.
Never look into my eyes if all you do is lie.
Never say hello, if you really mean goodbye.
If you really mean forever, then say you will try.
Never say forever 'cause forever makes me cry.
Taken from Really Sad Love Quotes
Inspired to collect by (500) Days of Summer
Monday, September 28, 2009
Funny Story
I felt lucky tonight. We've been going out for more than 2 years already and I have been dying to hear him pop the question. He has been hinting about a special dinner date and even bought me nice jewelry for the occassion. Only I don't know what the occasion is.
"I'm sure of it." That's what all my girlfriends say. "He's the one."
I tried on a few dresses that night. It was so hard to choose the right one for tonight. I don't want to look too sleezy, but I don't want to look too casual. I wanted something that said, I'm serious about this. It took a while, but I got there in the end. I know he likes white, so I went with my silky white skirt and lacey white blouse. It took me another hour for the make up and hair, but it was worth it.
I got to the rendezvous point and he was there waiting for me patiently. I greeted me with a warm hug and a peck on my cheek.
"Hi Princess. You look great." I smiled back. "Shall we?"
I nodded as my heart raced even more. We were headed to a classy restaurant! He really did go all out for this night. I'm sure of it now.
Dinner went uneventful. Thoughts were racing through my mind, of how he would propose. Would it be the ring in the champange? Or a strong of violins? Or just a speech and getting down on his knees in front of everyone. My heart beat so fast, I thought I was going to faint. The anxiety was just overwhelming.
Dinner ended and nothing happened. I can't say I was disappointed. I know he still had a whole night planned ahead, but I thought that the restaurant would be a more romantic place. He'd better live up to my standards.
As we walked out the door, a gust of cold wind blew past us. As if a reflex, he gave me a squeeze which restored my faith in him, instantly warming me up despite the cold air. I smiled again.
Then, when I least expect it, he got down on his knees.
I couldn't help but I burst out, saying how much I love him and how much I wanted this to happen. I was saying Yes before he could say anything.
Then I realised that he was looking at me with a perculiar look.
"Isn't that what you wanted to say?"
"Honey... I am just tying my shoe laces..."
"I'm sure of it." That's what all my girlfriends say. "He's the one."
I tried on a few dresses that night. It was so hard to choose the right one for tonight. I don't want to look too sleezy, but I don't want to look too casual. I wanted something that said, I'm serious about this. It took a while, but I got there in the end. I know he likes white, so I went with my silky white skirt and lacey white blouse. It took me another hour for the make up and hair, but it was worth it.
I got to the rendezvous point and he was there waiting for me patiently. I greeted me with a warm hug and a peck on my cheek.
"Hi Princess. You look great." I smiled back. "Shall we?"
I nodded as my heart raced even more. We were headed to a classy restaurant! He really did go all out for this night. I'm sure of it now.
Dinner went uneventful. Thoughts were racing through my mind, of how he would propose. Would it be the ring in the champange? Or a strong of violins? Or just a speech and getting down on his knees in front of everyone. My heart beat so fast, I thought I was going to faint. The anxiety was just overwhelming.
Dinner ended and nothing happened. I can't say I was disappointed. I know he still had a whole night planned ahead, but I thought that the restaurant would be a more romantic place. He'd better live up to my standards.
As we walked out the door, a gust of cold wind blew past us. As if a reflex, he gave me a squeeze which restored my faith in him, instantly warming me up despite the cold air. I smiled again.
Then, when I least expect it, he got down on his knees.
I couldn't help but I burst out, saying how much I love him and how much I wanted this to happen. I was saying Yes before he could say anything.
Then I realised that he was looking at me with a perculiar look.
"Isn't that what you wanted to say?"
"Honey... I am just tying my shoe laces..."
I Care
I want you to know, how much I care.
I want you to show, but only if you dare.
Your every happy every woe, every dream every nightmare.
Your every high and every low, I really wished you'd share.
I'll make it snow, if that is what you declare.
I want you to show, but only if you dare.
Your every happy every woe, every dream every nightmare.
Your every high and every low, I really wished you'd share.
I'll make it snow, if that is what you declare.
For you, I will go, just about everywhere.
For today and tomorrow, I'll always treat you fair.
My love can only grow, this I swear.
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